Tuesday, January 18, 2011

Skins MTV

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Skins MTV: MTV premieres its American remake, "Skins," Monday (Jan. 17) at 10 p.m. ET after a special airing of the network's other so-called contribution to the downfall of society, "Jersey Shore." And while fans of the British hit will find it watered down compared to the original, there is plenty left in the remake to offend our delicate American sensibilities.

In fact the Parents Television Council (PTC) released what they called "the most urgent alert" they've ever sent to parents last week on "Skins." If you're not familiar with the watchdog group: It "aims to provide parents with the tools they need to make informed television viewing decisions" in order to "help to protect your children from entertainment's negative effects."

"It is absolutely crucial," their release states. "That you be aware of the most dangerous program that has ever been foisted on your children!"

All that condemnation and the PTC hasn't even seen the actual series. Instead, they make their conclusions from MTV's sneak preview videos. The group watches TV shows and logs the perceived dangers to our children. So, we thought we'd do them a favor (since, we've actually watched the first episode). And they should be worried.

Here are 11 things in the "Skins" premiere episode that will make the PTC cringe:

1.) General disrespect towards grownups and their rules - The pilot is packed with disobedience and disrespect to elders. Tony (played by James Newman) may be the biggest culprit in the premiere. He distracts his stepfather, so his sister (who obviously had a night of hard-partying) can sneak back into the house. He talks back to a teacher at the neighboring all-girls school and then leaves while the teacher tells him to stay put. And he lies to Stanley's (Daniel Flaherty) parents in order to get him out of the house.

2.) Strong language - The series is rated TV-MA partially for its language and there are lots of A-words, B-words and a P-word thrown in for good measure.

3.) Age-inappropriate flirting - In the first 10 minutes, a neighbor woman flaunts her nude goods through the window at Tony. Chris (Jesse Carere) openly flirts with his teacher, who isn't very effective at discouraging him. Cougar alert!

4.) Toilet humor, literally - There's talk of taking "a dump" and there's public urination. Well, when you have to go, you have to go. That's just nature.

skins-mtv-ptc-premiere-320.jpg5.) Raging sexuality: Um, obvs. That's basically the driving force for most teens in entertainment depictions. In the "Skins" pilot, getting Stanley laid is the No. 1 goal. There's lot of masturbation and/or references to masturbation. And clearly, these kids are all sexually active. Oh, and did we mention that Tea (Sofia D'elia-Black) is lesbian and very good at it we must say.

6.) Degradation of women's private parts - Oh, there's all kind of creative and not so creative ways that the cast refers to women's body parts i.e. "nips," and "furry city," are just a couple of the euphemisms used.

7.) The ill affects of bad dental hygiene: A girl with an obvious need for braces finds acceptance in sexual promiscuity. Take care of your teeth, kids!

8.) Religious disobedience - We weren't sure we would include this, since it mostly occurs with Abbud (Ron Mustafaa), who is Muslim. And we know how Americans are supposed to feel about that religion. Eh, religion is religion to us, so it's on the list.

9.) Rampant, unabashed drug use - Drug use is all over the pilot, but more specifically Stanley purchases a kilo of marijuana to sell to other kids at a party. Oh, we forgot, he buys it at a whorehouse. Later, we'll see the effects of an overdose. No kids were hurt in the process, just a gas-guzzling, war-creating SUV.

10.) Glorification of the male private parts - Lots of tight shots of Tony's crotch and general erection activity among the male cast. In one scene, a drug dealer (see No. 9 above) grabs Stanley's package. In another scene, resident girl with issues, Cadie (Britne Oldford), gets creative with vegetables...

11.) The suburbs are not safe: Oh, we know private schools, cul de sacs, and big driveways for the two SUVS are heralded for their pristine living and family values. Of course, anyone who has met a kid from the suburbs knows they're just as or more debaucherous than kids who grow up in the city.

Of course, none of this stuff is that crazy to us. We were teens once.

Will you be tuning in to the PTC's most dangerous show on TV?

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